This week, Simon is mostly asphyxiating.
At the height of his popularity as a world famous rapper and kiddie fiddler, Simon's world was brought crashing down around his ears when he was caught indulging in a spot of asphyxiation for sexual pleasure.
The public were outraged; it is, of course, acceptable to fuck children, but getting the horn from being strangled? Disgusting.
Simon was forced to retire from the public eye and now lives with his uncle (and lover also), Alfonso, in a small hut in Madagascar.